Making Changes

[paige_kate]

This year I turned 30. Yeah, it's not as big a deal now to be 30 and single as it used to be, but it was still pretty depressing. Thanksgiving with my family was depressing because one of my uncles is in jail and it's cause a bit of a rift in the family, plus I was sick with a migraine after busting my ass to get the house and the food ready for Thanksgiving. My mom commented that the only thing she had to cook Thanksgiving was the potatoes. I prepped and cooked the turkey, cooked the chicken and noodles and baked a pie. I don't know what's going to happen next year with our family. Hopefully, things will be better, I'm taking it one day at a time.

I've been a Christian my whole life, but over the last several years, I've stopped going to church. I first thought it was because I'd suddenly become an athiest or an agnostic, but now I think it's because I've fallen out with the church I've been attending my whole life. I'm a Libera, I believe in science, Evolution, climate change and in diversity, the church I go to is very conservative and I became increasingly angry and frustrated with the church's insistance on trying to make American History and science fit into their view of the world, so I'm going to find another church that I feel comfortable with and I'm going to get back to my faith and hopefully open my life up to meeting new people.

I've decided to start making things for Project Linus. I don't have children(though I'm hopeful) and other than a few ladies my mom works with, no friends who are have children(I'm hopeful that will change too), but I love making things that make people happy and giving a blanket to a child who needs it will help.

Comments

[jessm78.livejournal.com]

I felt the same way when I turned 30 and was still single (and it still feels pretty crummy that I'm going to be 35 in a few months and in the middle of divorce... *sigh*). Sorry to hear Thanksgiving was depressing. :( *hugs*

I can relate, sorta. I've been a Catholic all my life. When I was in my last year of high school I stopped attending church regularly and all through college and into my 20s and early 30s, I only attended on Christmas and Easter. That was also due to the particular parish I belonged to. They just drove me nuts, it's kinda hard to explain. Not so much about their beliefs (I'm more on the conservative/libertarian side *ducks*, and I am a scientist so I don't believe evolution is a hoax or evil or whatever some churches try to teach), but more about the way things were run. After I got married last year and went through hell thanks to my soon-to-be ex, I started going to church again. I went through so much physical and emotional stress, it made me feel better to go and I just felt more at peace. I've learned more about who I am and now that I'm back home with my parents, I'm back in my old parish and things are a lot better than they were over 15 years ago.

[kate-mct.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't mind the conservatism so much if they didn't insist on trying to reconstruct history and science to fit their views rather than taking history and science as it is. I literally listened to a sermon and picked apart all the things that I KNEW weren't true or that he was manipulating to serve his purpose and it made me so mad I nearly walked out. It hurts because I grew up in that church and was baptized in it and to know that it has changed to the point that I no longer feel comfortable attending services bothers me.

Thanksgiving was depressing but we're going to make Christmas better. This year has just stunk for our family, my mother has two siblings that are battling life-threatening diseases and my dad's favorite aunt died and one of his brothers is in jail.

[jessm78.livejournal.com]

You know that not all conservatives are like this, right? (Are you talking about conservatism in general or just some churches that purport to be conservative and talk about how evolution is wrong, etc.) My uncle is a born-again Christian and when he would visit (he no longer does, I think he's mad at us but I really don't care) he would tell us how we were all going to hell because we didn't follow his brand of Christianity. There are extremists on all sides unfortunately and I understand how you feel about not feeling welcome at the church you were baptized in.

Aw, I'm glad to her it. :) I'm really sorry to hear about everything you guys have been going through.

[kate-mct.livejournal.com]

I do know that, I love that church and a lot of the people there I've known my whole life, but I don't want to attend a church where facts on non-religious matters are ignored or twisted to suit the speaker's beliefs.

Yeah, it's stunk other than our trip to Charleston, SC, but we're taking it one day at a time.

[jessm78.livejournal.com]

Okay, sorry if it looked like I jumped on you there... things have been tough lately and I've been a little defensive about things like this (nearly got defriended by someone even though I really hadn't said anything - it was just because our beliefs were so different).

That's about the only thing you can do. Same with me and my divorce.

[kate-mct.livejournal.com]

No, that's okay, that's one of the sucky parts about email: you can't express emotion very well. I'm an 'agree to disagree' kind of person anyway :)